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"EVEN A MAGGOT IS SOMEBODY'S CHILD!"

Kay T. Didd, Chairperson
PETI, People for the Ethical Treatment of Insects


This year, 329.5 trillion of our multilegged, exoskeletoned brothers and sisters will end their days richocheting off windshields, doing deep knee bends on flypaper, or getting zapped into blue-light popcorn on countless porches of doom. Imagine the look of terror that must fill their little compound eyes in those horrifying moments before a rolled-up newspaper turns them into Rorschach blots! Imagine how their entire metamorphosis - from egg to larva to pupa to adult - must flash before them when they realize that a heel from hell is about to stomp them into the linoleum!

IT DOESN'T STOP THERE!

When not being squashed, smeared, or sprayed, our crawling cousins are callously kept from the bounty of our tables by screen doors and citronella candles. Why? Why? How much of your pork chop could a blowfly eat? This madness must end! America, it's time to stand up for the "little people" and say "ENOUGH! STOP THE CARNAGE! START THE HEALING!"
Baby Maggot in Carriage

Join us in our fight for legislation that will:

  • Outlaw private ownership of door or window screns with mesh too small to allow the passage of an average-size yam.
  • Establish a 72-hour "cooling off" period for all purchasers of repellents, headnets and swatters.
  • Reduce maximum highway speeds to 8 miles per hour, which will allow insects to safely dodge automobiles.
  • Require moth-friendly afety shields on all candles, lanterns and tiki torches.
  • Provide tax incentives for restaurants with flies so thick that salad bar patrons can't tell the three-bean blend frm the blue cheese crumbles.
  • Multiply property taxes by the number of trash-cans lids in use.
  • Initiate a mandatory return to outhoss.
  • Establish lackfly and mosquito breeder swamps.
  • Elevate weevils, roaches, ticks, chiggers, blowflies, fire ants, moths, locusts and silverfish to National Treasure status.
  • Mandate a "three strikes and you're out" policy: Flatten any three Natioal Treasures and you get 10 years without parole.

Join us today! Together we can win.

PETI: People for the Ethical Treatment of Insects



Reprinted with permission from Field & Stream, September 2002.



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